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PEOPLE Filipinos are descendants of Malay explorers but the bloodline has been infused with Chinese, Arab, Indian, Spanish and American lineages. This fusion of cultures has given rise to no less than 111 distinct cultural and linguistic groups, each with its basic Malayo-Polynesian roots but with varying degrees of other foreign influences. PSYCHE The wamth and hospitality of Filipinos are known throughout the world. Guests are plied with food and drink, and often, a place in the host's own home. It may be generosity to a fault, but there is nothing more pleasing to Filipinos than knowing that their guest is never wanting for anything . Filipinos have a strong sense of family. Three generations often come together. Aunts and uncles (titas and titos) help raise and discipline the children as secondary parents. In turn, cousins grow up as informal siblings. The grandparents and elderly members of the family are the family's source of history and stories and are taken cared of until their last days. Visitors and guests to family gatherings would do well to pay their respects to the elderly clan members. Pagmamano, taking the elder person's right hand and bringing it to your forehead, is a great sign of respect. Similarly calling them lolo (grandfather) and lola (grandmother) and adding the honorific po to your sentences denotes your recognition of their age and rank in the clan structure. Filipinos are expressive talkers, incorporating eyes, mouth, and hands in their speech. In this way, depth and nuance are added to something that cannot be said or put into words. Courteous language and gentle demeanor are the norm; exaggerated movements and boisterous speech are frowned upon and considered by the elder generation as uncouth. Direct eye contact is always avoided since it is an agressive stance and regarded as offensive. Pointed or direct remarks are avoided, and sensitive topics are best left untouched. Westerners might find it rather tiresome and long-winded. Nevertheless, it goes a long way when developing relationships with Filipinos. The importance of "keeping one's face," meant as pride and self-esteem, is very important to Filipinos. Sensitive and delicate topics are often avoided to prevent misunderstanidngs, criticisms, or fights. "Losing face" is the worst thing that a Filipino can think of happening to him. Thus, the sense of hiya or being sensitive to the pride and self-esteem of others is a quality learned early on. Sociologists have come up with a term defining this quality -- smooth interpersonal relationships or pakikisama. By trying to "get along,"Filipinos adopt a group mindset, thinking and doing what everyone in the group decides. This is not indecision or passivity, but Filipinos do not care to be the odd one out. Filipinos dislike upsetting anyone and that's why they make it a point never to ruffle any feathers, whether directly or indirectly. If forced to give a negative answer, the Filipino will say something without explicitly saying "no." Pakikiramdaman or the sensitivity afforded by one to another comes in. Simply, this is feeling each other out or, more concretely, sensing what is not said. This aids in completing the gaps or the omissions in the conversation because every Filipino knows that much of what is not said in any conversation is as weighty as words that are spoken. Another Filipino trait is utang na loob or recognizing a personal indebtness owed to the one who has bestowed favors. It's quite simple: favors long past are never forgotten and are always remembered to be reciprocated with similar or greater kindness. Something like a gracious quid pro quo, but it is not a forced reciprocation. Because of hiya and smooth interpersonal relationships, returning the favor is almost an unspoken given. Resilient and optimistic in the face of adversity, Filipinos are spontaneous and convivial in their celebration of life, best exemplified in festivals and fiestas. |